moving on up.

i hope you come with me :) i'm here now.

currently watching: father of the bride part ii :)

american idol recap: week three.

motown week. love it :)

matt: "let's get it on" oh man. i have no words. well, i have words, but i don't want to publish them...hahaha. i'm just kidding. kind of :)

kris: "how sweet it is" how sweet it is is right. i love this guy. didn't really like his shirt much, but his voice is amazing.

scott: "you can't hurry love" i'm so glad that he stayed true to himself and played the piano :) also, i really liked his version of this song. it was fun :)

megan: "for once in my life" i just love her voice. she's so different, and i love it. even though she has some...interesting dance moves, i think that she's fantastic :) i disagree with the judges.

anoop: "ooh baby, baby" i have to say that i think he did a good job tonight. although there were times the falsetto was a little shaky, i think that overall, it was very smooth and sweet.

michael: "ain't too proud to beg" like i've said, i think he's a super guy, but he won't win. i will say that i liked this week better than last week :)

lil: "heat wave" i love this girl. she is so powerful. she wanted to make aretha, diana and gladys proud, and i think she did.

adam: "the tracks of my tears" he is so beautiful. he is totally working his resemblance to elvis presley. also, he was looking sort of like kurt russell. i love him. love him.

danny: "get ready" this guy is off the chain. he's so fun, so talented and so good at entertaining. love him. he didn't listen to smokey, though...which i think is weird. oh well, i still think he rocks :)

allison: "papa was a rolling stone" um...i think it's safe to say that she's incredibly amazing. she blows my mind every week. i think that she's fascinating. she's incredible. i can't get enough of her.


favorite of the night: hmmm...this is so hard. i think that it's probably allison. or adam. or matt. i liked those three the best. i also liked when simon drew a mustache on paula's face. bahahaha.


"to be a star, you've got to be conceited." simon cowell. bahaha.

"i've got six words for you: one of the best performances of the night." cara dioguardi. um...that's eight words.


currently watching: american idol...on dvr because i had to watch LOST :)

writer's block.

so, for the last few days, i've been feeling like i need to write something...or i want to write something, but i don't have anything to say. that being said, i guess this post is completely pointless. ha. nothing really exciting is going on in my life right now, which is probably the reason i don't have anything to say. nothing's changing at the moment. i'm sort of just chillin' and waiting for the next chapter to start. i'll start classes again (never thought i'd say that!) on may 28, and although i've known that for weeks now, it's sort of just now sinking in. i'll be starting classes again. it still sounds weird when i say it. so, i guess this turned into a little something :)

currently watching: full house.

here's something to look at.

i like: Jesus. singing. Elvis. Regis and Kelly. my friends. my camera. taking pictures of my friends with my camera. Boy Meets World. New York. my brothers. sarcasm. shoes. accessories. sleeping. the smell of rain. the first time i feel fall in the air. mother's cookies. celebrity gossip (guilty pleasure). laughing so hard i cry. laughing so hard my stomach hurts. Broadway. Christmas music. rainbows. magazines (star, people, glamour, etc.). being spontaneous. making other people smile. crafting. writing. reading. movies. watching good movies with good friends. chinese food. old people :). pink. green. chocolate. cookies & cream milkshakes from chick-fil-a. (RED). things that are perforated. Charles Gibson. whistling. pandas. kroger. the beach. starbucks. Diane Sawyer. warm weather. macaroni & cheese. getting my nails done. chick-fil-a lemonade. Jergens original scent lotion. brown. the pearls my mom gave me. Cary Grant. making lists. playing my brother's drums. happy endings. making fish faces with my cousin.

i don't like: sticky residue. hair that isn't attached. the dark. feeling stupid. when the bottoms of my pants get wet. being stressed. when i lose things. people reading over my shoulder. when my hair gets my clothes wet. pepsi. feet. when movies have bad endings. being let down. mean people. when my hair looks bad. cotton balls. when there's no hot water. shower curtains. drains. being sandy. stubbing my toe. packing. unpacking. goodbyes.

currently watching: house.

american idol recap: week two.

michael: um...i missed this one :( but, i bet that he did a good job, but didn't blow it out of the water. he's a very likeable guy, but not american idol in my opinion.

allison: "blame it on your heart" she rocccccccks. this girl is amaaaaazzzzzzing. seriously.

kris: "to make you feel my love" he is amazing. and beautiful. simon even gave him a thumbs up

lil: "independence day" i looooove this song, i love lil, but this wasn't my favorite song for her. i don't care, i still love her. she deserves to be in this competition for a long time.

adam: "ring of fire" um...i love adam, but i don't know if i was really into his performance tonight...i'll give him props for uniqueness.

scott: "wild angels" everyone loves him. i think that the beginning was a little shaky, but i still think that he's awesome :) i love when he plays those keys :) i'm so proud of simon for sticking up for scott when paula was calling his piano a crutch.

alexis grace: "jolene" i like her. i think she's super cute, and she's got a strong voice. that being said, brooke white sang this song last season, and i liked her version better.

danny gokey: "Jesus, take the wheel" i just have to say his first and last name for some reason. okay, the first time i heard this song, i cried, and (shocker) i cried again tonight. i love him. he deserves so so much. he is amazing.

anoop: "you were always on my mind" i love this song, and i have to say that i actually liked anoop's version of it. i think that he totally redeemed himself and did awesome tonight :)

megan joy: "walkin' after midnight" i have to say that i absolutely love her. i think that she is gorgeous and extremely talented. she better at least get a recording contract out of this. she sang incredibly AND she has the flu. she rocks.

matt: "so small" um...he was awesome. probably one of the top performers in my opinion. i love him on the piano, and i think that he is beyond talented. i love love love him. he's going to be the underdog in this competition...like the one that sneaks up on everyone.

my favorite from the night: watching paula stumble over the word "authenticity." bahahaha. okay, really, probably either matt or danny. i think that they are totally on the top.

currently watching: american idol

bullfrogs.

i know i just wrote about summer coming a couple of days ago, but i was reminded again last week that summer is indeed on its way when i heard the first low croaks of our bullfrogs. every summer night, i'm serenaded to sleep by a chorus of bullfrogs and crickets, and i love it. when i heard the first one the other day, it was just like music to my ears (i know that sounds cheesy, but it's true). each day, they've been getting louder and more frogs have been joining in, and like i said, it may be lame, but i love it. just another sign that summer is coming, and for that, i'm grateful :)

currently watching: catwoman...i thought i'd give this movie a shot...

rainy days.

i love rainy days when i can just sit inside and do nothing. watch tv. watch movies. read a book. the rain gives me a much welcomed excuse to simply do whatever makes me happy. i don't feel bad about sitting in my pajamas in the same spot on the couch for as long as i want to...or until i have to pee. ha. anyway. i just love the rain. and the rain's mood.

currently watching: ps: i love you. good movie. makes me cry my eyes out.

american idol recap: week one.

oh, american idol. i'm completely addicted to this show. i love it. i love watching it every year, and i almost always cry when whoever wins. every year, trace and i go to the concert, and i'm already stoked about this year! tonight was michael jackson night, and i won't lie. i like michael jackson. okay, this is a long post, but whatevs. oh, and one more thing: why was paula wearing feathers? also, i think she was totally stoned.

lil rounds: first of all, i love her. she has a great story, a great personality and an amaaaaaaaaaazing voice. i think that she'll be staying in this competition for quite some time. tonight, she sang "the way you make me feel" and rocked it! she put her own little soulful twist on the pretty pop-y song. i loved it...and, well, i love that song anyway.

scott macintyre: what a beautiful person. he was born almost entirely blind, and he plays the piano better than most pianists who can see. this guy is beyond talented. scott sang "keep the faith," and although it's not one of michael jackson's most well-known songs, he did a great job, and really sold it (to me at least).

danny gokey: okay, who doesn't love this guy? not only does he have a wonderful heart, but this boy can SANG! tonight, he sang p.y.t. (pretty young thing), and like always, he blew me away :) he is always so soulful and has some serious stage presence. i could deffffffinitely go to a danny gokey concert. um...it wouldn't surprise me if he was at least in the top three...i can't call the winner just yet :)

michael carver: what a great guy. he has a good heart and a great story - he's totally likeable and relateable. he sang "you are not alone" tonight, and did a very good job...i don't think he's the best, but he is a great guy, and he knows how to pick the right songs.

jasmine murray: verrrrrry cute. i'm glad she got called back for the wildcard, because i think that she has serious potential. tonight she sang "i'll be there," and first of all, this is probably one of my favorite songs...i don't know why, but i love it :) i think that she did a good job...very safe choice, but she performed well :) she's got a big voice for such a young girl.

kris allen: i like him. he's fun and young, and i'm sure he's got a huuuuuge fan base...especially of teen girls that are totally bummed that he's married - haha. he sang "remember the time," and i loved it. he rocked out on his guitar and had fun...very jason mraz (randy even said that!! i thought it first, though) i think that he likes the stage :)

allison iraheta: she is beyond cute. she's this little latin spitfire, and even though she's only 16, she has one of the biggest voices ever...i would compare her to kelly clarkson. i think she's phenomenal. she sang "give into me"...let me rephrase that - she ROCKED "give into me." i think we'll be seeing her for a long time :)

anoop desai: anoop doggy dog! this guy cracks me up. i'm totally stoked that he made it into the top 13...i'm also stoked that he picked "beat it." love that song. i think he did a pretty good job :) i mean, it wasn't my favorite performance of the night, but it wasn't horrible...he had fun :) i do agree with paula that no one can really touch that song other than michael himself.

jorge nunez: i love puerto ricans :) he has so much life and such a great attitude. i love this guy...watching his story made me cry! shocker. he sang "never can say goodbye," and i think that he did a fine job. he has a beautiful voice, but it just wasn't my favorite song. i still like him :)

megan joy: i looooooove her sound. she's so unique, and i just love her. i think that she is so fun...and someone that i would be friends with - haha :) tonight, she sang "rockin' robin" and was AWESOME. the judges didn't think it was as great as i did, but i thought she totally rocked it. also, i think that she's gorgeous.

adam lambert: um, come on? could anyone deny that this guy is totally awesome? he toured with the cast of WICKED for crying out loud. we all know that he rocks, and he is so different from all of the other contestants, and totally blows me away. tonight, adam sang "black and white," and like always, he totally rocked. this dude can sing for realllllz.

matt giraud: i am sooooo glad that he got called back for the wildcard...i was so hoping that he would get through to the top 12...uh, 13. haha. he is so talented, and i'm excited to see what he conitinues to do. i love it when he plays the piano and lets his soulfulness shine...like he did tonight when he sang "human nature." i just really like this guy.

alexis grace: this girl is so cool. she also has a uniqe sound, and i think that she has a pretty big future ahead of her. she was the first one voted in to the top 12/13, and she totally deserved it :) she always rocks, and tonight's "dirty diana" was no different. she's such a cute little thing, but she can belt it out.

whew. rest assured, next week's will be shorter :) i just love this show. also, something is supposed to change with the voting tomorrow, and i'm anxious to see what it is...i'm guessing that the judges are going to have more of a say in things...we'll see :)

currently watching: american idol - duh :)

spring and summer.

something i've been thinking about for the last couple of days is that no matter how long it feels like the winter drags out...no matter how cold and dark it gets, spring and summer always come again. there is always rebirth and growth.

i think the same is true for our lives...we go through the same seasonal ups and downs, and no matter how cold and dark our life feels, there is a promise of spring on the horizon. now the timing of course is a little different...there aren't three perfect months for every season, but spring and summer will come again. we will come back to life.


currently watching: moulin rouge.

l-o-v-e.

love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. love never ends.

1 corinthians 13:7-8


i love this passage. it's the perfect description of love...the most true way i could ever describe in words what love is to anyone. i think that was redundant, but this is one of my favorite little parts in the Bible :)


currently watching: who wants to be a millionaire :)

my shepherd.

the LORD is my shepherd;
i shall not want.

this scripture has never meant more to me than it does right now. my Lord is not only protecting me, but also leading me through what is one of the most...different stages of my life. i've never been exactly where i am right now...afraid to spend any money because i don't know when i'll make any money or how much i'll make. it's very weird, and i know that i'm not the only person who is struggling with financial stuff right now, but this is the first time that i've ever felt overwhelmed by all of it.

so if you think of me at any time, please just say a prayer both that i would be encouraged and that God will really pull me through this. i know that he's the only way that i'll get anywhere.

currently watching: jeopardy!

lost...not the show.

lately i've been feeling more lost than liberated. i don't know what to do right now, where to look, where to go or anything. i mean, i'm planning on starting at ksu in the summer, but that's not certain. i don't have a job lined up, and i need some income. i just don't even know. and i know that God knows, and that is comforting, but it's still hard for me to have so many uncertainties flying around and feeling sort of...i don't know...alone in this. i don't mean to be down, but i'm just overwhelmed...by uncertainty, i guess.

currently watching: friends.

it's official.

i am going back to school :) i'm going to enroll in ksu to get my master of arts in teaching - english. i'm really excited about it too :) i'll have to take some pre-requisite classes, and then i'll start the program next spring. it's so weird to think about going back. and it's also weird, because i know that this experience as a student is going to be completely different than my berry experience. berry was where i grew up. where i learned how to make "adult" decisions...whatever those are. and i'm not saying that i have nothing left to learn, but it's just different. and i'm really excited about this new journey. it will definitely be an adventure, and i can't wait :)

currently watching: days of our lives...i know, i know.

LOST and The Office.

LOST: this show blow my mind. i get so excited when i can make a connection. i love when they answer questions, but i also love when they leave you hanging. that's why this show is so addicting. i didn't even watch it on television for the first three seasons. one of my professors and my old boss got me hooked on it. i can think of at least one day that i didn't even leave my room that summer because i couldn't tear myself away from the television. how ridiculous is that?! i just love it. whether it's trying to figure out whether or not i like richard alpert or who kate's going to end up with, i love the questions and answers...even if they do take a while :) awesome show with excellent writing, acting and direction.

The Office: i am in love with this show. this is another show that i didn't exactly watch all of on television...in fact, i watched an entire season in one night after i bought them. i started watching one day, and just fell in love. its clever writing never gets old and always catches me off guard. i mean i'm also a sucker for a good love story, so the whole pam and jim thing got me too, but i always laugh in this show. i just can't get over how funny it is.

well, i guess i just wanted to talk about my two favorite shows. if i had to pick to shows to keep watching, it would be these two. i mean, we all know that i'm addicted to several other tv shows, but these are the ones that i really can't live without.

currently watching: full house.

oh, change.

change is very interesting. i always try to think of it as a good thing. a new chance to start on a great, new adventure. right now, though. i'm not really sure of what that new adventure is for me. i've got a lot of things to think about and consider, but not a lot of time.

up until now, i realize that this blog post has been confusing, so i'll try to clarify. i will no longer be a full-time employee of premier firewood. it was a completely mutual thing based on a lot of other factors. i'll still be doing some things for them here and there, but that's it. that's why this new "beginning" has so many options.

should i go looking for another full-time job? i did that all summer, and to be honest, that was not exactly a high point in my life. i refuse to spend all day looking for jobs on the internet, so i guess i could just go out and look around...?

should i look at this as a "sign" that maybe i should go back to school? there is nothing holding me back other than the fact that i need some income.

i guess i'm just trying to figure everything out in one day, which isn't very helpful, but i do need to decide soon, unfortunately. any suggestions?

currently listening to: a fine frenzy.

ahhhhh.

i just want everyone to know that i LOVE the chrysler building. i love it. i think that it's probably weird to love a building, but i just think that art deco style stainless steel arches and gargoyles are beautiful...and i don't even usually like gargoyles. it's maybe my favorite building...it's at least top 5...right up there with the fox theatre. i sort of want to live there...haha :)

currently watching: regis & kelly...well, it's on in the background :)

my 25.

i decided to follow in jessica's footsteps and post my 25 random things on here as well :) also, i decided to add a 26th...


1. I could drink milk with almost any meal.
2. I sing a lot.
3. I am completely addicted to email. Seriously.
4. I don't like my food to touch...so I really love the plates with the little dividers.
5. I also eat my food once at a time...usually counterclockwise.
6. If I have macaroni and cheese on my plate, I always eat it first.
7. I am also shamelessly addicted to television. I love it.
8. I've been known to watch a movie twice in a row (only a few...)
9. Speaking of movies, I'm a little addicted to them as well...While You Were Sleeping, Two Weeks Notice, The Little Mermaid, Titanic, Star Wars, The Mighty Ducks, etc. I'll give almost any movie a try :)
10. I would eat a pound of white chocolate everyday if I wouldn't gain 500 pounds...I have a GIGANTIC sweet tooth.
11. I sleep with a teddy bear, and (obviously) I'm not afraid to admit it.
12. I'm not a cat person, but I do like my cat...who doesn't have a name.
13. I'm sort of obsessed with my dog. He's the best.
14. I wouldn't trade my friends or family for anything in the world...they have truly shaped who I am.
15. I love Jesus...and his grace.
16. I freak out if I can't find my phone after about two seconds.
17. That being said, I tend to leave my phone in lots of places...I left it on the top of my car once which didn't really end well.
18. Laugh all you want, but I love Titanic. I would watch it all the time, but I don't usually have three hours of free time.
19. I can't buy just one song...I have to have the whole album.
20. I think that The Office is one of the best shows on television. Ever.
21. I think the same about LOST.
22. I have huge tonsils...my dentists always talks about them.
23. I am a packrat...I just can't seem to get rid of anything that might possibly have some sentimental value.
24. I am addicted to caffeine...the way I look at it is that it could be worse. It could be crack.
25. I love MacBooks and think that no one should ever have to suffer through owning a PC.
26. I looooooooooooooooooove football. Love it.


currently watching: the superbowl...and then the office :) i love television.

psalms.

i've been reading through psalms lately, and one thing that i absolutely love about it is how david just pours his heart out. no inhibitions. no worries. i love it because he tells God exactly what he's thinking whether it's praising God on his magnificence or begging God to hear his prayer and show him favor. it's so heartfelt and meaningful. i love it.

currently watching: you've got mail.

ps: i think that's also the reason i tend to like sad songs...they are just an outpouring of emotions (not trying to compare songs to psalms, but...)

school.

okay, for some reason lately, i've been thinking about going back to school. i know, call me crazy, but it's just something i've been thinking about. if i did, it would either be to become a high school english teacher or to get my master's in communication...maybe to teach college later...? i just don't know. what do you think?

currently listening to: dave matthews band radio on pandora

fail.

okay, i've been checking this fail blog every now and then since michael blogged about it, but i just recently subscribed to it through google reader. some of the stuff on there isn't really that hilarious, but every once an a while, a video will catch me off guard and make me laugh out loud. this morning, however, this picture is what caught me off guard...i don't even know why i think it's that funny, but it just cracks me up...enjoy :)

hope.

Why are you downcast, o my soul,
and why are you in turmoil within me?
Hope in God; for I shall again praise him,
my salvation and my God.

Psalm 43:5

this is a verse that i hold on to when i start to get stressed or feel overwhelmed. i just love how it's sort of like a conversation with yourself. "why are you stressed? hope in God, duh." i don't know. i just feel like it's one of those things that should be a lot easier than it is sometimes - hope in God. it's that easy. and yes, it should be. i just find myself having to have that conversation with myself to often when i wish that it was more natural. i will say, though, that i am learning, and it's starting to become more of an instinct :)

currently listening to: nothing.

2009.

a new year. i'm excited about all that 2009 will bring. i know that this is going to be an amazing year in my life and in the life of the people around me, and i just can't wait to see what will happen. it's hard for me to believe that last year is over. it was one of the best years of my life, and i'm really excited about the next one...in case you couldn't tell :) i just really like new beginnings.

that being said, michael talked about yearly goals and life goals today, and i really thought his message was awesome. he referenced Philippians 3:12-16, and the part that sticks out to me the most is "But one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead." i love that. forget the past and strain toward the future.

currently watching: the dark knight...i seriously love this movie.